


In Beautiful Dreams

by imamotherfuckingstarlord



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet, Dean Winchester - Freeform, Death, F/M, SPN - Freeform, Sad, Sam Winchester - Freeform, Supernatural - Freeform, dean pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-01
Updated: 2017-01-01
Packaged: 2018-09-13 22:38:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9145342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imamotherfuckingstarlord/pseuds/imamotherfuckingstarlord
Summary: Dean Winchester comes back to the same hospital he had visited years ago. Sam isn't sure why they stopped there, but he's about to find out that maybe he doesn't know everything about his older brother. Or the life he lead while Sam was away at college.





	

_We’re together in dreams, in dreams_

The black Impala pulled into the parking lot of a hospital, Dean’s eyes were locked forward not noticing the glance his brother sent him.

“St. Teresa Hospital? Why are we here, Dean?”

Dean parked the car, shut the ignition off and turned to Sam.

“I need to see someone. You can come with or stay,” Dean offered handing him the keys and getting out of the car without waiting for an answer.

Sam watched his older brother walk away from the classic car and head straight into the hospital. He sat in the Impala for a minute, going through all the endless places they had been in the past few years. Not able to place this city or hospital, Sam sighed and got out of the car.

 

The sun flooded through the window, the light shined down on the flowers your co-workers had sent. Purple tulips, right at the end of the bed on the movable table each room in the hospital had. Your body felt tired and run down, but no pain. The medication was doing it’s job. 

“You comfortable?” Mei asked.

Looking up at your best friend, she set the book she was reading down. You nodded, but still reached for her hand. She smiled warmly and took it.

“I’m good, thank you. I could use something to eat, can you get something from the cafeteria?”

Mei immediately got up and squeezed her palm against yours, “Something chocolatey?”

You laughed and nodded vigorously, “Hell, yes.”

Mei winked at you before exiting your private room, leaving you alone. You closed your eyes, trying to relax. And within seconds your mind was filled with images of those green eyes. You could see them so clearly, so brightly like the first time all over again. Your mouth formed a smile, letting memories glide through like a slideshow.

“Dean!” You yelped, running from him as he tried dragging you into the lake. He roared with laughter as he caught up to you, his arms slide around your waist.

“No, Dean!” You cried in between laughter. He pulled you over his shoulder and jogged toward the lake.

“It’s just a little water, princess.”

Princess..

“Princess.”

Your eyes fluttered open, looking right up at the white bland ceiling.

“Hey, princess.”

Your head whipped to the left and there he was.

Dean Winchester.

“Dean,” your heart fluttered as the man walked into the room. It had been nearly six months since you had last seen the hunter. He stood there, wearing the familiar leather jacket and soft smile.

“Princess, did you think I’d let you go without a goodbye?”

Tears formed in your eyes, smirking at the man you had fallen in love with in your fleeting youth. Who you pondered over every night, right before you slipped into simple dreams. Dean walked over to you, immediately leaned down toward the hospital bed and kissed you warmly on the lips.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, I should have came sooner,” Dean’s voice broke into a low sob, little pools of tears formed in the corner of his remarkably green eyes. Over the years the green of his eyes became your favorite color, often you looked in many places and faces for that certain green. But it seemed, Dean was the only holder of such a color and rightfully so.

“It’s okay love, you were busy saving people,” your voice was so small and feeble, it killed Dean to hear your once vibrate voice faded.

“Still-”

“- please, Dean. I don’t have much time left, I was only waiting for you.”

You reached for his hand and when he took it, Dean broke down. He caved into your side, shoulders shaking and his hand clutched at your blue hospital gown. You rubbed his back, feeling wrecked seeing the always strong man weakened. But he needed to grieve, you had months to come to terms with your death. It had been a long time coming, this you knew. You were just happy to have your hair this time around, the thought may have seemed superficial at first, but cancer was a real son of a bitch. It had taken nearly everything from you and having your hair was a godsend. If only because it meant Dean could run his calloused fingers through it once more. The way he used to in bed, walking down the street or just because he felt like it. It was the most soothing feeling in the world, to be gently caressed by a lover. By Dean. You knew what his life was about and the arrangement the two of you had worked well for all these years. You were a head nurse at this very hospital and he was traveling across the country, hunting down monsters. And every so often, the two of you would come together. A week here, a few days there. The total amount the two of you spent together only added up to a year. And you would not trade it for anything in the universe. Nothing could or would ever compare to the way Dean made you feel, to the way he loved you wholeheartedly. He gave all he could and if that was not enough for you, nothing would ever be.

“Love, it will be okay,” you assured him. Your fingers lifted his chin up, his eyes red and swollen. A stray tear ran down his cheek, you smiled and wiped it away.

“You’re here now, can we just enjoy this time?”

Dean closed his eyes, his hand gripped at your leg. In his mind, he was beating himself up for not being there for you sooner.

“Dean, don’t do that,” you demanded taking his hand, because you knew him well enough, “It won’t do you any good or me. I want you here, fully here.”

And like that, all the self hatred slipped away from him like sand running through his fingers. You did that to him, for him. The steady balance he always craved and wanted. He wanted to give you it all, quit hunting, get the house and have the kids. And he nearly done so, but the world had other plans. Fate had laid out a detailed plan for him and you knew this. You had loved him for it, for being so strong and selfless. Righteous. The moment you had laid eyes on the man, when he was the one in the hospital bed, you knew he was special.

......  
“Room 12B, two broken ribs. He’s going to need to stay a few days, keep an eye on him,” your charge nurse handed you over the patient’s file and walked away. It was your first year as a RN and you were starting from the bottom, trying to work your way up to head nurse. You mainly had night shifts, which you liked. It was quiet most of the time. You walked toward the room, but stopped at the door to look at the file.

Rob Seger.

“Okay, Mr. Seger,” you strolled into the room, eyes still focused on the paperwork, “A few broken ribs, but you’ll be just fine. We want you to stay a few days, just to make sure everything settles fine.”

Finally looking away from the file, you’re met with two beautiful green eyes. And a tired looking young man, who looked around your age. You quickly scanned the paper, he was 21 just like you.

He smiled at you, trying to shifted himself up into a sitting position. Dean winced in pain and you rushed to his side.

“Don’t be a hero, let me help,” you attempt scolded him, but a playful tone came through instead.

He smiled, “Thanks, princess.”

“Don’t call me that and you’re welcome, Rob.”

Dean’s face scrunched in confusion, but he quickly caught his mistake. And so did you. The two of you stared at each other for moment, before Dean smiled with a shrug.

“It’s Dean Winchester, I don’t have insurance,” he gave you a charismatic smile and if you had to be truthful, it had hit you in the core of your being. Something about him had the pit of your stomach itching, your heart fluttered in a way it never had. An indescribable feeling came over you.

“Dean, I like that much better,” you chuckled at Dean’s satisfied expression, “And don’t worry, I got you.”  
......  
As you held Dean’s hand, you think of that moment knowing exactly what that feeling was. It was love. First love. You sighed softly, as Dean leaned his head against your chest, his hand wrapped around you waist. Twenty minutes had gone by since he walked into the room, he helped you scoot over and got into bed with you. It felt good to have his warm body against yours again, like the endless nights from before. He listened closely to your heart beating underneath the gown, his head moving with your chest. Dean knew your time was dwindling down and he let the thought of a crossroad demon fill his mind. He could get 10 good years with you, at least 10. But would that be an even crueler fate? To be with each other, have the life and kids, only to have it gripped away years down the road. Dean moved his head back to get a look at you. Your eyes were closed, a smile on your face as your fingers ran up and down his back. And he knew then, you would never want him to do that. To sell his soul to hell for you. The guilt would destroy you and Dean couldn’t do that to you. Not you. So instead he straightened up and pulled you into his chest.

“You know I’ve always loved you, right?” He asked quietly.

You hand ran up his chest to his face, looking up at him you bring down his face to yours.

“Oh, Dean. I could never forget that, because it’s made me the luckiest person in the world,” you moaned softly before placing your lips against his. Neither of you want to pull away, afraid it would be the last, knowing it would be. But Dean pulled away first, afraid you couldn’t breathe properly.

He kissed you on the forehead, “Are you tired? Rest princess, I’m not going anywhere.”

 

......

“They are beautiful, aren’t they?”

A voice behind Sam made him jump from doorway of your hospital room. He turned to see your friend Mei, standing there with a piece of chocolate cake. She smiled at him, but her eyes were filled with pain.

“I-um yeah,” Sam ran a hand over his face, “I’m sorry, I’m Sam W-”

“-Dean’s brother,” Mei chimed in, peering into the room.

“How about some coffee? I’ll bring the cake to her in a bit, let them have their time.”

Sam looked toward the room, before following the woman.

The two of them settled into a table tucked in the corner of the cafeteria, hot coffees in front of them.

“You look like someone with a lot of questions,” Mei gave Sam an empathetic smile.

“Yeah, well Dean never told me about,” Sam shook his head, “I’m sorry, I don’t even know her name.”

“Y/N, she’s is, was the head nurse here,” Mei sighed, “She met Dean here about 5 years ago.”

“Why was Dean here?” Sam’s voice was filled with alert.

“Wow, you really were kept out of the loop, huh?” Mei took a sip from her coffee, a little ‘mmh’ leaves her mouth as she placed the cup down.

“Broken ribs, Y/N was his nurse. They hit it off right away and after he was discharged he stayed around for a bit.”

Sam listened to every word Mei said, taking it all in and finding himself wondering who his brother was. Whom Dean had been when he was off at Stanford. Sam leaned back into his chair and listened to Mei tell the love story of Dean and you.

......  
Dean’s fingers ran through your hair and the little pain you were starting to fill, had vanished with every stroke, “You remember that time at the lake?”

You laughed with the fond memory in your head, “Of course I do! You practically drowned me!”

Dean’s body shook as he cried out in laughter, your head nuzzled against his heavily chest. You felt high off his laugh, it had always been one of your favorite sounds in the entire world.

“It’s was just a little water, princess.”

“I love you, Dean Winchester,” you wiped the laughter induced tears from your eyes.

Dean beamed at the sound of his name coming from you, it felt 21 again. His heart pounded against his chest and he slid his free hand into his pocket.

“Then marry me, baby.”

His fingers touched the silver ring in his pocket, he had picked it out years ago. Your froze against his body. For a very brief moment, you thought he was only doing this because you were a dying woman. But this was your Dean. He would never do such a thing.

You pulled from his chest and looked up at him and cried out with eyes full of tears, “Yes.”

He smiled so wide, you were sure his jaw was in pain. Quickly, Dean took out the simple silver ring, with a small white pearl.

“I should have given this to you a long time ago,” Dean fought back the tears from his eyes.

Holding out your left hand to the hunter, you shook your head, “No love, we have now. We have now.”

Dean slipped the ring onto your finger and it fit like it was meant for you. He knew it was. Dean brought your left hand to his plumped lips and kissed each finger softly.

“Think we can get this done today?” He questioned, not wanting to wait another second.

You smiled at him brightly, “Have you met Mei?”

The two of you laughed, before sharing a long kiss.

......  
Dean walked into the cafeteria, immediately spotting Sam and Mei in the far corner together. He knew he should have told Sam about you a long time ago, but he wanted to keep you away from that part of his life. The hunter life. And now you were slipping from his grasp by the second and he was going to have you until the very end. So he strolled up to the table, smiling down at Mei who jumped from her seat.

“Dean Winchester, you son of a bitch it’s good to see you,” Mei hugged him tightly, pressing a kiss on his cheek.

“You look good, Mei,” he loved her for being there for you and for keeping him updated. He was eternally grateful for her, always would be.

“Y/N said something about chocolate?” Dean looked over at the cake on the table. Mei laughed and grabbed the cake, walking away but Dean grabbed a hold of her elbow. He leaned down to her ear and whispered, “I did it.”

Mei’s eyes widen, biting down on her lip trying in vain to prevent the tear shed. But it was too late, she was sobbing into Dean’s chest, dampening it profusely. Dean looked at his brother, who smiled weakly at him.

He patted Mei’s back, “It’s going to be okay.”

Mei moved away from him, wiping away the tears, “It is now. I’m going to go see her, we have some plans to work on.”

Dean watched her walk away, before taking her seat across from Sam. The two Winchesters stood in silent, until Sam cleared his throat.

“I’m so sorry, Dean.”

Dean smiled at his little brother, “I know Sammy. I should have told you sooner, but-”

“- you didn’t want to bring her into the life,” Sam concluded, knowing the feeling all too well.

“Yeah, well it didn’t do her any good.”

“Come on, Dean.” Sam leaned against the table and looked right at his brother, “She has cancer, not even you could save her.’

Dean stood silent, looking down at his hands, “Yeah, well I should have left the gig a long time ago, like you did. But I had to bring you back in and now I’m going to lose her.”

“No one can escape the hunter’s life, it’s been proven time and time again,” Sam pointed out, trying desperately to ground Dean’s guilt.

“I told her about the life after we first met. Everything Sam, I didn’t hold back.”

Sam fell silent, a lump in his throat appeared. He had never told anyone about his life, not a single soul at Stanford, not even Jess.

“And she believed you?”

Dean chuckled, “That’s my girl. She believed me and didn’t care. She allowed herself to fall in love with someone like me.”

“Wait, did Dad know about Y/N?”

“He met her once,” Dean confessed with a smirk, “Oh man, she gave him a hard time. He really liked her, surprisingly.”

Sam was in disbelief, watching Dean’s eyes fade into a memory.

“When a hunt brought us close to here and if he didn’t need my help, he’d dropped me off in town. Picked me up whenever he was done. It went on for years, but sometimes I would take cases alone and come by here.”

Dean thought of all the times he’d driven the Impala to see you, the two of you would spend an entire week together. Every free moment together.

“I guess when you left, Dad was afraid I’d jump ship too. So he wouldn’t say much when I’d leave to visit Y/N.”

“I never remembered Dad being so understanding,” Sam shook his head, letting out a low sigh.

“I think he knew it was different with Y/N. I love her, I’ve always loved her.”

“Well, you should spend all the time you can with her.”

“I plan to Sam. I also plan on marrying her today.”

.......  
A calmness blanketed over the room, a handful of people -mainly co-workers- were settled into the pews of the hospital chapel. Sam stood at Dean’s side at the altar, the officiant walked in and shook hands with Dean. He stood there in his brown leather jacket, a black shirt underneath and a pair of blue jeans. Sam glanced at his brother’s face, the look of serenity was written all over it.

Then the doors of the chapel opened and there you were, the light from the window behind you illuminated your figure. In the light blue sundress you wore on your first date with Dean, hair curled a little past your shoulders, you stood at the door. Dean held back a choked sob, because you looked like an angel. A beautiful angel. Mei was at your side, ready to escort you down the aisle, but you smiled at her and refused. You wanted to make the journey alone, wanted to walk toward Dean with a full heart. You needed to.

Everyone stood up as you made your way to Dean. Your eyes wandered to Sam, who stood there with a warm smile. His heart beated fast with joy and ache, wishing this was happening under different circumstances. Wishing that this had happened years go, just so Dean and you could have what the two of you deserved the most. Happiness.

Dean’s eyes locked on yours and everyone disappeared. It was just the two of you. No cancer. No monsters. It was Dean and you at the lake, running around and kissing in the water. The cool breeze against your skin and Dean’s warm lips on yours. The cold beers and loud laughs. Shirtless Dean bringing his body down on yours, forever cementing the love you had for each other.

Dean held out his hand to you, helping you up the small step. The officiant started the ceremony, but neither of you were really paying much attention. You were focused on the green of his iris, the little rays of a lighter shade of the color popped up making you smile. Dean was busy trying to memorize the lines on your face, the plump of you lips and the little scar you had above your right eyebrow. He held your hand and hoped he would never forget the warmth he felt. He looked at you and locked you up deep within his heart, building a brick wall. He would never allow you to come out, never allow anyone or anything to break through that brick way. You were his and only his. The two of you had said ‘I do’ with such swiftness, it had everyone laughing in the chapel. Then Dean took you face in his hands and kissed you like it was the very first time.

.......  
“Oh really!” You laughed, throwing your hand down and smiling at the pair of Aces you had.

Dean’s face fell as he threw down his hand, “Beginners luck, princess.”

“Whatever you say,” you smiled smugly getting up from the table and walking over to the diner’s counter to get your cokes refilled.

Dean looked outside, hoping to not see the Impala. He had been released a few days ago and had called his Dad to come get him. John would be arriving soon. You sat back down and pushed Dean’s coke toward him.

“So is this our first date or what?” You asked, sipping the cold drink.

Dean pursed his lips, “Only if you want it to be.”

“I do,” you say without hesitation.

“You know what you want, huh?” Dean was impressed, but mostly relieved. He had fought to not fall for you over course of his stay, but it proved damn near impossible.

“Honestly, I really like you, but I travel a lot,” he sighed, reaching across the table for your hand. You expected to feel a wave of disappointment, but it never arrived. Instead you smiled at the handsome man and brought his hand to your lips.

“I’ll be waiting,” you smiled pressing a kiss on his rough knuckles. And you swore the man blushed, as you moved his hand back down. Just then a car honked and it was time for Dean to go. He grabbed his green duffel bag and pulled you out of the booth.

“I promise you. I’m coming back for you, princess.”

Dean’s words never held such certain truth as he pulled you into his body and pressed a promised kissed against your lips.

“I’ll be waiting, Dean Winchester.”

.......  
You laid next to your husband on the hospital bed, Sam and Mei were sitting on each side of the bed. The four of you were telling stories and laughing so loudly, you were sure someone would complain, but it was you. The staff had loved you and would do anything to make the rest of your stay pleasant.

“You should have seen her!” Mei howled, as you warned her to not even go there.

“Now you have to tell us,” Dean demanded with a smile.

“She was so drunk, I mean delusional drunk,” Mei started, but you threw a pillow at her face. Sam threw his head back in laughter and Dean moved you closer to him.

“So she’s going around the bar, demanding to see everyone’s eye. Sloppy drunk yelling at everyone,” Mei stood up and started stumbling over to Sam, who was trying to stifle a laugh.

“Let me see your goddamn eyes right now sir! I’m a registered nurse!” Mei imitated the way you had attacked this one man, on Sam. She pushed his head back and peered deep into his eyes for a good minute before pulling back.

“HAZEL! NO ONE HAS DEAN COLORED EYES!” Mei yelled, slurring her words as she fumbled back to her chair. She plopped down, “Scout’s honor, she went to every single person in that bar until they finally kicked us out.”

The room exploded in laughter.

.......  
An hour later, Sam and Mei had left to go pick up a few pizzas noting that Dean and you had to have a wedding dinner.

“You know what?” Dean suddenly asked, sitting up on the bed combing the hair from your face.

“What?”

“We never had our first wedding dance.”

You smiled up at your husband, “Well, I think you owe me a dance husband.”

Dean grinned and helped you out of bed. You walked over to the Ipod dock Mei had brought weeks ago for you and scanned through your Ipod for that one song. You looked up from the dock to Dean, his eyes moist with tears.

“Our song,” he whispered as you move toward him. You gripped the sides of your blue sundress and swayed toward Dean, he lit up at the energy you were projecting. You were you again. Just like that one night at the bar.

It had been another great week with Dean, but he had to leave in the morning to help John out on a hunt. You were anything but mad. You were proud of Dean. It made you want to make the best of the night, take all you could before you had to say goodbye.

“Dance with me, Winchester,” you placed down your beer and looked over at the jukebox in the corner of the bar.

Dean was not a dancer, but the way you had looked at him, he would be anything you wanted him to be.

“Pick the song, princess.”

You bit your lip, jumping out of the booth and making your way to the jukebox. It took a few moments of flipping through the different songs until you see it. You make the selection and turn to the booth, but Dean was right behind you, waiting for you.

The song started to play and Roy Orbison’s voice soothed out of the speakers.

“I close my eyes and then I drift away. Into the magic night, I softly say. A silent prayer like dreamers do. Then I fall asleep to dream my dreams of you..”

Dean pulled you into the middle of the bar, not caring about the several inebriated people watching from their sullen booths. His hands go to your waist, as yours slipped around his neck. The two of you swayed slowly to the song, his fingers pressed into the cotton fabric of your blue sundress. His forehead pressed down on yours and nothing mattered in the moment. Not the long hours at the hospital or the monsters lingering in the dark. It was just the two of you. And the music.

“In the dreams I walk with you. In the dreams I talk to you..”

Dean held you close, letting you rest against his body as the two of you danced in the middle of the room. That same song from the bar filled the hospital room and it was like nothing outside the walls existed. No cancer, no monsters. Just husband and wife. Dean rested his forehead against your head, his arms held you up the waist. He could feel you slipping away from him, there was only so much time left. He would cherish every millisecond with you, every breath.

You hummed along to the song, taking in the smell of Dean. Hoping your heaven would be filled with his scent, you were convinced it would be.

Dean started to sing softly to the song, so only you could hear. His lips moved against your ear, placing a kiss on your left earlobe.

“In my dreams you’re mine all the time. We’re together in dreams, in dreams..” his heart swore the promise to you, tears gathered in both of your eyes. Together you cried, together you danced.

......  
Three days later, after the wedding, you made a turn for the worse. Dean was stronger than ever, he held your hand through it all. Always taking the time to caresses his fingers through your hair, soothing both himself and you. Sam and Mei made sure the two of you had everything your hearts desired, which mainly was alone time.

“It’s almost time, love. I can feel it,” you mumbled into Dean’s chest, clutching at his forearm.

“I know, princess. I’m here to the end,” he reassured you, fighting the urge to break down.He knew there would be time for that, once you were gone. For now, he needed to be strong for you.

“I’m not scared, Dean.”

“Of course you’re not, baby,” he chuckled, “You’re the strongest person I’ve ever met.”

“Promise me something,” you sighed, the weight of breathing was taking a toll on you. Your body was shutting down, you could feel everything slowly coming to a stop.

“Anything.”

“You keep fighting. You keep saving people. And don’t be afraid to love again,” you downright demanded, asserting your voice. Dean laughs softly, pressing a kiss on your head.

“I’ll keep fighting and saving, but I can’t promise the last part,” Dean pulled your chin up toward him, “ Sweetheart, you’re the love of my life. I could never love anyone again like this.”

His words have you sobbing into his chest, “I don’t want to leave you, Dean.”

You crying out his name, it breaks the barrier down. He only lets go for a mere second, a choked sob rumbled up his throat and nearly makes it’s way out, before Dean pulls it back in. He took a moment to recover, before rubbing his hand along your back.

“You’ll have me in Heaven. I’ll be there, a version of me. A stand in, until I can really be with you.”

Dean’s voice is so sure of it, you are entirely convinced and the tears stop all together. You hoped it didn’t hurt, that you would just simply go. You hoped Sam would be there for Dean, so he wouldn’t feel alone.

“It will be us at the lake, our song playing on the radio. Cold beers and I’ll throw you in the lake again.”

You let out a rough laugh, nodding happily with your husband.

“I’ll wait for you, but take your time okay?” You looked up at Dean, your hand moved to his face. You gently ran your fingers along his jawline and up to his lips. Your thumb touched his lips over and over until Dean caught them with his hand. He pulled your fragile body up against his own and suddenly he knew. It was time to let you go.

“I love you, Y/N Winchester.”

You sighed contently, closing your eyes as Dean’s head inched closer to yours. You waited for what seemed like forever, enjoying the anticipation one last time, before his plumped lips touched yours. The kiss was sweet, it was yours to keep forever.

“I love you, Dean Winchester.”

_The sun was blaring down on your face, warming your cheeks up. You could smell the lake feet from you and the cool breeze hit your skin in a shiver. And then you hear it, that familiar song playing somewhere in the background._

_In dreams I walk with you, in dreams I talk with you. In dreams you’re mine all the time. We’re together in dreams, in dreams…_

_“Come on, princess!”_

_Your eyes jerked open, the blue sky shined down on you. You moved your head up to see where the beautiful voice was coming from. And there he was._

_Dean stood there, shirtless running from the lake, toward you. A beaming smile on his face, holding out his hand as he drew upon you._

_“Princess, come on. It’s just a little water.”_

_He bent forward, taking your hand in his, ready to pull you up. But all you saw where those gorgeous green eyes, the ones you had loved for so long. The different shades of green shined right at you._

_Oh yes, this was heaven._


End file.
